Effective Mentoring – The Paradigm Shift

By Doug Lawrence, Founder and President, TalentC 

Over the course of the past couple of weeks I have been asked a number of questions that speak to the mentoring process or mentoring discipline. I wanted to take a few moments to touch on those. I have noted that the traditional style of mentoring – an older more experienced person working with someone that is younger and less experienced provides a comfort level that mentors embrace. Stepping outside the box to form a trusted two way relationship is something that may challenge our thinking. Accepting the fact that in effective or modern mentoring the mentor is going to learn as much as the mentee can be a challenge. I approach each mentoring session with an open mind and knowing that I am going to learn something as a result of the time I am spending with another person. That piece of knowledge may be something about myself but suffice it to say that I come away from each meeting enriched by the experience. We need to be willing to challenge the norm which is no longer the norm with effective/modern mentoring knocking on the door.

With effective or modern mentoring there is no script to follow so the relationship will be fluid and flexible. There is no script as there will be times that you are just there to listen. If we try to follow a set agenda we end up with a relationship that struggles to exist as it becomes forced. I have listened to mentors that follow an agenda or try to and you hear the frustration in their voice as the relationship is not flourishing like they had hope it would.

One other question that keeps surfacing is that need to work with someone from the same industry. I can share with you that I mentor people from different industries all the time. I do not have the industry specific experience that my mentee does but I can still bring value to the relationship. When we teach our mentor training program I like to share stories about the mentoring process and I always say that working with a mentor that is from the same industry is a nice to have – not a need to have. As a mentor that doesn’t have that industry experience I will have a ton of questions to ask to learn more and demonstrate a genuine interest in you as a person. It will help me better understand what it takes to do your job and I will also learn the complexities of the work environment you are immersed in – good or bad! It will help us build that trusted relationship!

The last question that I want to respond to is the importance of training. I am going to be speaking to a group of mentees this evening and sharing with them the “gift of mentoring” and what it is all about. It doesn’t matter if you are a mentor or a mentee you are better prepared for the mentoring journey if you have some sort of training. That training can be a two hour/four hour workshop or you may decide to pursue a more formal training approach. The bottom line is that you are better prepared if you have had training. One of the reasons that mentoring programs fail is the lack of training. Don’t be the person or organization that adds to that statistic.

Mentoring is becoming more popular as each day goes by. Mentors can and will make a difference in your personal and professional life but only if you take advantage of that service. Effective mentors are here to be of service. You just need to reach out to them – “can you afford not to?”

References:
1. http://www.forbes.com/2010/06/30/mentor-coach-executive-training-leadership-managing-ccl.html
2. http://www.riversoftware.com/resources/ModernMentoring_TJ_April15.pdf

Article republished with permission from Doug Lawrence
Original article can be found here